2009: I Propose...

Legal Age for Smoking to be 18. “Teenagers” can have sex “legally” when they are 18 (age of consent) or even less in some communities; and they can purchase alcohol, vote for an imbecile, or even drive a car – all these – three years before buying a cigarette. Oh, come on...!

Condom Vending Machines. The Paradise Isle is recording less than 1% Population Growth; and obviously the islanders are not getting enough sex. Just look at the frustrated idiots in Jathika Chinthana Paravahaya et al. Sorry, I’m not promoting their site by giving the link here.

Playboy Sri Lanka. From Sigiriya and Embekke to Bellanwila Temple, we are a nation that appreciates feminine beauty, undoubtedly. If the best description of a woman in our history is written by a Buddhist monk, why can’t we have Playboy today? At least, in the name of literature..!

Duty Free Cigarettes. The local brands are twice or more harmful than the imported cigarettes – compare the tarnic (Tar & Nicotine) levels. So, for the sake of our own health, why not allow “less harmful” cigarettes – even if they are taxed? More money to the government, more choice for us.

Underwear Ads. With real-people in real underwear. See Playboy above.

Legalise Prostitution. If Dubai can do so much without legalising it, why can’t we do it, legally? According to a good friend of mine, who is a very senior officer at the Dubai Police, the “night-club and meat-market culture” has been a major reason for the reduced rate of crimes and sexual offenses in Dubai. Besides, we could nominate someone like Wimal to oversee the business, isn’t he good at pimping?

A Night-hub for Families and Friends. Mangala’s Beira Lake Project didn’t take off, but wouldn’t it be nice to have an area where there are cafés and restaurants with lots of stuff to do in the night? For the young and the old? Kind of 21st Century Galle Face, kind of a night market..?

Sri Lanka to revert to its old name, Ceylon. Ceylon Tea, CGR, CTB... we are still very much Ceylonese at the core – and the image it connotes is rather romantic, welcoming and pleasant.

English to be the “working” language, officially. And a Language Protection Act to protect the purity of Sinhala and Tamil languages from the new wave FM channels.

Tamil Nadu to be the “Dravidastan” or “Ealam” Independent Tamil State. Paradise isle is for those who’d like to live in harmony, all LTTE Sympathisers can take off to Tamil Nadu – the official Tamil-only nation. One way tickets provided courtesy Mihin Air!

A “National Interest” Act. An Act that protects the national interests and allows us to take the culprits like Asantha De Mel to courts. It could even be the ones that are not releasing the land to build highways etc., or someone like Ranil who doesn’t seem to understand what “rejected by the public” means. The Nation, its People and their interests, first.

Take Anonymous Bloggers Out of Kottu: Those who run blogs tarnishing the image of our country but has no balls to show their profile.

Ban Political Parties that promote racial and cultural divide. So no more JHU, TNA or Muslim Congress – only the inclusive, non-partial, national parties allowed. SWRD and his family has caused so much damage by “Sinhalisation” and we mustn’t let division take over.

Internal Roaming. From Dialog to Mobitel to Tigo to Dialog – when we cross the non-coverage areas. Its a bugger to switch SIM cards you know. Plus, Credit Transfer from mobile to mobile. :)

24-hours Bill Payment Centre. For Water, Electricity and Traffic Fines. So that we don’t have to leave work for little things in life.

e-Cash for Government Payments. So that, hopefully one day, this country shall be rid of corruption... It has to begin somewhere, right?


  1. What's with the underwear and porn? LOL...

    Not a bad list though...

  2. Hey Sach, I miss the nice Triumph billboards, MR got them dressed up! Porn is a basic necessity for a guy – I’m fighting for the rights of the younger generation, lolz. Besides, I’m in Saudi these days, what do you expect?

  3. Smashing idea, reverting to Ceylon!

  4. I agree with everything except the first one...why lead the young to a horrible habit that early?

  5. Surani, as strange as it may sound, all the guys I know who smoked and drank in college have grown apart from the habit now; they drink and smoke socially. The ones who took up the habit later in their life seem to be addicted, or rather heavy on smoking and drinking.
    Might be a good idea to try the social-taboos early, so one could and grow out of it as they mature..? Donno. Just a thought.