Sanga’s Sixer to Hutch...

Sangakkara switches from Hutch to Airtel. His fans are disappointed, they think Sanga was unethical and he has let them down.

They blame Sanga.

Sanga has not breached the contract he signed with Hutch or its ad agency. The contact expires and a cleverer agency negotiates a deal that discriminated the old brand he was representing. It may be unethical on Sanga’s part (I didn’t think sleeping with the enemy was that easy); but it is definitely not illegal. I’m sure he must have asked for a huge lump sum to say what he says about the old brand.

It is the agency’s responsibility to negotiate fees with celebrities – and they draft the contracts – usually with a certain amount of exclusivity to protect the brands. Ideally, the exclusivity prevents the celebrity from endorsing the competition a for couple of years, even after the expiry of the contract. There is a silly mistake agencies tend to make while negotiating: they tend to encourage less exclusivity so that they could pay the celebrity much less than they’d demand. More conditions cost more money, so they think it is best to stick to a basic agreement that doesn’t cover much, and cost much.

Agencies think that they are doing a great big favour to the client by offering a celebrity for an ‘affordable’ price-tag. Think cheap and act cheap – and it is sure to cheapen the brand in the long run.

Ad agencies should learn to pay the celebrities what they are worth. It is the agency’s sole responsibility to protect the brand with an air-tight contract, they should not also forget that the more money they pay the celebrity, the more commission they are going to make.

Our agencies should learn more on how to handle the models and brand ambassadors. They need to learn how to draw model releases and exclusive contracts. This is not the first time a celebrity takes a brand for a ride; the agencies are the brand guardians – they must know how to protect their brands.

Hutch is paying the price today for some account manager’s stupidity and short-sightedness, while the fans blame Sangakkara for for being unethical in business.

I’d say it’s the ad agency that’s to be blamed for this mess and if I were Hutch, I would fire the agency, on the spot.

Australian MBA and Migrating?

“Bogus Colleges in UK to be Screen Out” read a recent news article.

There is this 23 year old who has an MBA and she worked with me in her first ever proper job. When I heard that she never worked before, I couldn’t help but wonder how could she be a “Master” in Business Administration, when she has NEVER set foot in a business organisation before!

The islanders of Paradise are crazy about their higher education. Almost everyone I know in the Paradise has a professional qualification – a CIM, CIMA, BA, BSc, BCS, MBBS, MBA or an XYZ. We think it makes our life easier if we have those big capital letters at the end of our name, especially if they came from the US, UK or Australia.

Well, they certainly help: to secure a job in Sri Lanka.

Once we find a job here, we are very likely to get caught in the system, get married or get buried under a career. Marriage and kids could kill the aspirations and dreams; family, house, car, loans etc could easily tie one down for good, clipping the wings. Without realising, one would be reaching the 40’s, making it harder for one to chase the American Dream or its British or Aussie equivalent.

The current state of affairs and the global financial crisis has got everyone looking for greener pastures, resulting in a mini ‘exodus’ and considerable brain-drain.

This post is meant for those who are thinking of escaping – specifically to Australia – chasing their dream:

• The Aussie economy is not doing well, just like most other countries. Its a great time to transfer your funds – the dollar has depreciated around 30%; but not a good time for job-hunting in the kangaroo land.
  
• A professional qualification – even from Monash – does not guarantee a job. Australia, like most countries, have a labour force of average qualifications; you might be “over qualified” for the job, if you have too many capital letters at the end of the name.
  
• Experience counts. Even more so than the paper qualifications. No one cares about the Sri Lankan experience, unless you happen to have gathered it at a multinational organisation, or an international bank.
  
• Be a specialist. Portray a focus in your career. Jack of all trades is not a ‘qualification’ – master of something, is.
  
• If one doesn’t possess the ‘local’ experience, it would be hard to find a ‘suitable’ job. Its impossible to gain local experience if one doesn’t have a local job. Catch 22?
  
• Its easy to find a job at waiting tables. My advise: don’t, unless you are 18.
  The early Sri Lankan migrants with their capital letters have done that and spoilt the market for the rest of the intellectuals – please don’t feed the trend.
  
• Aussies are scared if you have too many qualifications. They feel threatened, or they think you would leave for better prospects. Makes it much harder for the migrants with a wealth of experience to find a position on par with what they deserve.
  
• Even though the migration process is extremely well managed and well executed, CentreLink cannot do much for you. Its the headhunters (employment agencies) that find placements, and most headhunters have no idea what the actual job description entails. In summary, don’t expect much from headhunters or CentreLink.
  
• Have a focussed, but simple resumé that’s easy to digest. Something like, “Wijitha – the bus driver.”
  “So what did you do, Mr Wijitha?”
  “Well, I drove a bus, for 3 years.”
  End of conversation. Everybody understands. “Wijitha – Head of Creative - Activation” is far too complicated for the average recruitment specialist’s mind.
  
• Most job applications are made online; if your profile fits the excel sheet at the headhunters, you will be called for an interview. If not, you wander in the limboland. Very few has the common courtesy to respond to your emails.
  
• Be ready to do what Indians do all over the world: to downgrade your CV and customise to fit. Leave out all what’s unnecessary, make the CV fit the vacancy you see and you are on the fast-track to employment. Starting a step below is sometimes better than not starting at all.
  
• Try to find a job before you pack your bags. Line up a few interviews or prospects through your friends, family or associates. Fellow islanders from Paradise look out for one another (most of the time), they would be more fruitful than the headhunters, for sure.
  
• Its easier to find, and most jobs are available, at the entry level. Best is to migrate as early in your life as possible – so that starting at the bottom of the ladder is not a step (or a few steps) down. Ideal age, 20+. You are willing to start at the bottom and prove yourself, plus you have no excess baggage. No wives or kids, only virtual women in your bed.
  
• Professional Migration sounds romantic, but that’s where it stops. Securing a job through international placement agencies before arriving in Australia is a good thing, but its almost impossible with a silly lankan passport, whilst in silly lanka.
  
• Don’t wait until you are a senior manager to migrate. Its almost impossible to break in at the senior level for a Sri Lankan who has no international experience.
• There are some areas where there is potential: shipping, finance and IT for example. But remember, it’s not only you aiming for the job – there are Indians, Philipinos, Chinese and people from all over the world eying the same seat.
  

Bottom line: migration these days is not a dream come true. Its more like a dream with a nightmare in the middle. Expect a lot of hard work and effort once you arrive in Australia, things aren’t as easy as they used to be. Besides, the laws are getting tougher and tougher, the processing is getting tighter and tighter – its becoming increasingly difficult to migrate these days.

That said, there are also a few great attractions that Australia offers. A fabulously laid-back lifestyle that fits our “islander” attitude (in comparison to the rest of the West), the kangaroo passport and great schools for the kids. Most of all, its worth paying 1/3 or more of your income as taxes – the social care system will keep you alive when you are old and lonely, and too weak to fetch a glass of water for yourself.

Thank you, Your Holiness. Awesome Speech!

The world is going to miss the classic statements that came out of the mouth of the Ex-American President George W Bush. From reading a nursery book upside down and peeping through a telescope the other way around to the Easter Egg Hunt in Ei-raaq, he single-handedly kept the entire world entertained. Here’s a bit of the legacy – some of his more notable malaprops and mangled statements – he left behind, courtesy News 24 and my friend Fareed:

“I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.”
September 2000, explaining his energy policies at an event in Michigan.

“They misunderestimated the compassion of our country. I think they misunderestimated the will and determination of the commander-in-chief, too.”
September 26, 2001, in Langley, Virginia. Bush was referring to the terrorists who carried out the September 11 attacks.

“There’s no doubt in my mind, not one doubt in my mind, that we will fail.”
October 4, 2001, in Washington. Bush was remarking on a back-to-work plan after the terrorist attacks.

“It would be a mistake for the United States Senate to allow any kind of human cloning to come out of that chamber.”
April 10, 2002, at the White House, as Bush urged Senate passage of a broad ban on cloning.

“I want to thank the dozens of welfare-to-work stories, the actual examples of people who made the firm and solemn commitment to work hard to embetter themselves.”
April 18, 2002, at the White House.

“There’s an old saying in Tennessee - I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee - that says, fool me once, shame on - shame on you. Fool me - you can’t get fooled again.”
September 17, 2002, in Nashville, Tennessee.

“Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.”
August 5, 2004, at the signing ceremony for a defence spending bill.

“Too many good docs are getting out of business. Too many OB/GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.”
September 6, 2004, at a rally in Poplar Bluff, Missouri.

“Our most abundant energy source is coal. We have enough coal to last for 250 years, yet coal also prevents an environmental challenge.”
April 20, 2005, in Washington.

“We look forward to hearing your vision, so we can more better do our job.”
September 20, 2005, in Gulfport, Mississippi.

“I can’t wait to join you in the joy of welcoming neighbours back into neighbourhoods, and small businesses up and running, and cutting those ribbons that somebody is creating new jobs.”
September 5, 2005, when Bush met with residents of Poplarville, Mississippi, in the wake of Hurricane Katrina.

“It was not always a given that the United States and America would have a close relationship. After all, 60 years we were at war 60 years ago we were at war.”
June 29, 2006, at the White House, where Bush met with Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi.

“Make no mistake about it, I understand how tough it is, sir. I talk to families who die.”
December 7, 2006, in a joint appearance with British Prime Minister Tony Blair.

“These are big achievements for this country, and the people of Bulgaria ought to be proud of the achievements that they have achieved.”
June 11, 2007, in Sofia, Bulgaria.

“Mr Prime Minister, thank you for your introduction. Thank you for being such a fine host for the Opec summit.”
September 2007, in Sydney, Australia, where Bush was attending an Apec summit.

“Thank you, Your Holiness. Awesome speech.”
April 16, 2008, at a ceremony welcoming Pope Benedict XVI to the White House.

“The fact that they purchased the machine meant somebody had to make the machine. And when somebody makes a machine, it means there’s jobs at the machine-making place.”
May 27, 2008, in Mesa, Arizona.

“And they have no disregard for human life.”
July 15, 2008, at the White House. Bush was referring to enemy fighters in Afghanistan.

“I remember meeting a mother of a child who was abducted by the North Koreans right here in the Oval Office.”
June 26, 2008, during a Rose Garden news briefing.

“Throughout our history, the words of the Declaration have inspired immigrants from around the world to set sail to our shores. These immigrants have helped transform 13 small colonies into a great and growing nation of more than 300 people.”
July 4, 2008 in Virginia.

“The people in Louisiana must know that all across our country there’s a lot of prayer - prayer for those whose lives have been turned upside down. And I’m one of them. It’s good to come down here.”
September 3, 2008, at an emergency operations centre in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, after Hurricane Gustav hit the Gulf Coast.

“This thaw - took a while to thaw, it’s going to take a while to unthaw.”
October 20, 2008, in Alexandria, Louisiana, as he discussed the economy and frozen credit markets.